After
Serge-possessed Lynx has an odd, irrelevant encounter with Lynx-possessed
Serge, gets the magic sword Einlanzer, apparently loses it and the Masamune,
he stumbles upon a ruined city frozen in time itself. Lynx and pals
then go exploring, being taunted at every turn by the characters from
Chrono Trigger. Finally catching up with them at some place that looks
way too much like Leene's Bell but probably isn't, they meet Miguel.
Miguel is a scrawny man in a pith helmet who isn't Serge's father, but
did know him, fulfilling the prerequisite need for a mysterious character
from the past who delivers a shocking revelation. Unfortunately, his
revelation isn't so much shocking or revealing, as he mostly banters
about FATE and how nice it is to be in the Dead Sea where he never ages
or changes his clothes. He challenges Lynx and his motile luggage/ friends
to an INCREDIBLY cheap fight in which he uses the Schwartz (yes, as
seen in Space Balls) to cut you down in like one shot. Survive this
more or less by trial and error, and his death causes some sort of time-hiccup
that sort of annihalates half the world. A dragon saves them and says
some cryptic things. Even though it isn't even vaguely implied, your
next step will be to go back to the beach where Serge started this whole
damn confusing mess, and use the amulet to hop back to that other reality.
There's
a little side story in which the heroes storm Viper Manor again as they
seem to do every week, excluding new game + and any Viper Manor-storming
alternate universes not depicted in the mess. By wandering around and
beating things up as per usual, you'll earn the trust of about a half-dozen
more characters. Which means more meat in your rapidly-expanding army.
At some point, someone kind of hints that you should go to the Dead
Sea again in the dimension you didn't go to it in. Since you sort of
have the Einlanzer, it shouldn't be a problem, right? Wrong. Now you
have to earn the dragon's permission, which, in the fine tradition of
Gwaelyn's Love, is a physical object. You'll spend a few more hours
visiting the same six islands over and over, in both worlds, after doing
certain tasks. I think they purposely rigged it so you must complete
all the subquests in the game to advance beyond this point. Of note,
is the subquest that force-feeds reveals the origins of Nikki,
Captain Fargo, Marcy, and some other characters who are introduced in
the subquest so that their origins could be revealed. Fargo convinces
greedy-ass gambler Fargo to do something, which brings him to terms
with Nikki, who takes his transforming boat/stage to the island his
mother came from and plays out an incredibly long scene that leaves
the player begging for more [medication.] After defeating a bunch of
fish people and hearing an odd sound, you'll FINALLY get the chance,
to have the opportunity, to attempt to fight the Black Dragon. Oh yeah,
and Harle kind of disappears right around now.
Did
I mention after all this insane running around, the dragons themselves
usually fall dead in a few turns? SHOULD A THIN MAN IN A FREAKING PITH
HELMET HOLD MORE INNATE POWER THAN THE SIX DRAGON GODS WHO CONTROL LIFE
AS WE KNOW IT?! According to Square, yes.
With
that much accomplished, you're free to enter that mysterious realm where
nothing ever happens. After returning from Ohio, enter the Dead Sea
for another series of SHOCKING REVELATIONS. After fighting a pointless
boss fight with a floating head and hands, you can now enter...
CHRONOPOLIS!
Built
by Lucca herself, as a last-ditch measure to save this game, this hi-tech
time monitoring complex full of science and crap finally reveals the
delicate link between CT and CC. Since it's apparently futuristic, you'll
be wailed on by robots instead of fleshy things. Chronopolis successfully
portray both kinds of cities typically seen in the future: Ones that
look like shopping malls and ones that are in ruins. There are lots
of urine-colored ghosts floating around, mumbling about secret programs.
Oh, and did I mention Lavos is somehow stapled into the story? Yes,
he's not dead in another dimension or something, which causes a giant
computer called FATE to turn monkeys into humans using Lavos's radiation
and eventually all means that Kid is a clone of fan favorite female
at large, Schala. (Please don't give away the incredible secret ending
of CHRONO CROSS.) Apparently, Serge's DNA is the key to unlocking the
main control room of the place, which is why Lynx swapped bodies with
him. Holy crap, that almost made sense. See, Serge somehow became an
'Arbiter', as in 'Arbitrary Hero With Hidden Power', and since you used
the Dragon's Tear thingy to make him human again, you can enter the
room and fight Serge! Lynx! Uh, whatever. Kid gets hurt again.
Serge
and the rest finish off Lynx/Dark Serge/FATE by [Junctioning] to GF
[Doomtrain.] Kind of. Then all of the dragons wake up and merge into
a huge monster called TimeDevourer. Somebody, possibly one of those
recurring wise men, brings up that there is actually a hidden SEVENTH
elemental power in that world, and Harle was the god of it the whole
time! Tres wacky! Then a huge thing rises from the ocean, prompting
a tiny alien to teach your rowboat to fly. Serge, Kid, Strung Out Hippie
Doctor, Orhla, Korcha, Macha, Orcha, Pierre, Glenn, Razzly, Van, Riddel,
Viper, Zappa, Mel, Guile, and a cast of millions bravely storm
Terra Tower!! Despite the fact that the plot is all but resolved, and
the villain is dead, the game boldly dares to stagger onward to the
thrilling final sequence--
....Serge
and pals chill on the beach, as the cast of Chrono Trigger yammer on.
Then, everyone's at the bottom of the ocean fighting a very tiny TimeDevourer/Lavos.
It has Schala trapped in its back! Quickly, Serge, the melody of life!
The Chrono Cross is your only hope! Cast spells in some cockamamie order
to release the deus ex machina and save the day. Or go ape and slaughter
the both of them. Either way, the game ends. Either way, the game ending
is reward enough. The good ending treats you to a few dozen more hours
of talking.
Now,
get out of here, before time and space and public opinion blow me into
a thousand sarcastic little pieces.