I’m not having a great year, not gonna lie.

Back in April, I took a bad fall off a stepladder at work and fully tore my ACL, and about 4 months later reconstruction surgery was approved. The day after my pre-op visit, I had to put my cat, Nia down after her kidney disease advanced to the point she had gone blind, wouldn’t respond to me in any other way, and just started endlessly marching around the apartment for places to wedge herself. Next Friday, I go in for the operation itself and it’s fucking me up every time I remember this time while I’m on medical leave, I won’t have the little one around to snuggle up with.

At the same time, those around me have been so kind and helpful, it’s really helped keep me hanging on. I don’t exactly have a lot of self-esteem, like, on a fundamental, existential level. Like, I’m amazed people bother to remember my name at work, let alone offer to help me out. I feel like once this surgery is done and the red tape is in place for my recovery period, it’s time to stop holding back and do more shit I want to do while I’m able.

Sorry for the lack of… much, lately, but that’s where I’ve been. Work, PT, Discord and gaming ’til bedtime. I miss my baby kitty a lot and keep expecting her to slink around a corner or start yelling at me for food at the usual times. But I’m holding together, and I don’t feel so alone.

Thank you all, for everything.