Amazing Tater

     Amazing Tater is a game about a potato. That's right, a potato. A potato in a maze. Sounds fascinating, doesn't it? However, much like the Shinra Corporation, Bill Clinton, and Sesame Street, the fluffy exterior conceals a dank hell the dreams of Heironimus Bosch would wet themselves at.

     This is SPUD. His favorite hobbies include getting lost in the woods, competing in trap-filled track meets against other vegetables, and poetry. SPUD also seems to be more than a little autistic as, when you don't force him in a specific direction, he happily sits there and bounces up and down. Also, take note that he looks more like a smiling, perky rabbit dropping than an actual POTATO.

     This is really an interesting little game. Unlike most you- are- a- hapless- vegetable- in- a- maze games, there's nothing trying to kill you. There's a timer, but there are no time LIMITS or any sort of reward/punishment for taking too long. You can reset or backstep as much as you want. And there are really only two obstacles per se: rotating blocks and blocks you can shove around. The 'shove' blocks go into holes most of the time (make the obvious "Yeah, I've got some holes for you to shove blocks into" comment here) and the rotating doors serve the same purpose in this game as they do in real life. To get in your way when you're in a hurry. A rotating door at Mid-Ohio Con kept me disoriented for a good 20 minutes as people kept shoving it in random directions. Ever wonder how your laundry feels?

     The puzzles are harder than they'd seem, especially if you've got other things on your mind. I'm always devising new methods of making myself two dimensional or Sailor Jupiter three dimensional. Or creating a giant robot given only common household items. The fact is, helping a potato get to a little flag is probably about the least of my concerns. It's down there with sorting my recycling and giving Captain Novolin his insulin.

     The thing that gets me, is that a competition of sorts is even IMPLIED, yet you never have to beat anyone. You're alone in the world, SPUD. You are a rock- You are an is~land...

     On the highest difficulty, you're faced with the challenge of getting past satirical vegetarian "Weird Al" Yankovic. I wish.

Cripes, this is the stuff nightmares are made of.

Spud looks more like just a smiley face than a potato per se, but let's not hold that against him.

"AS SARTRE WOULD SAY, NO EXIT!"
-Sie Kensou