Super C
When a game does well, it's only natural that the developers assume doing it again with some awkward changes will be an even bigger hit. Such began the years when Contra pretentiously changed its name to just a 'C.' Super C. A name fit for a washed-out before- the- rinse- cycle hiphop singer.
Instead of Contra Island or whatever, the helicopter drops you smack dab in the middle of Los Angeles. Looks like the Red Falcon are up to their old tricks again, spreading hellfire and chaos while promoting physical fitness through random jogging. The guys with red batters' helmets still stand around looking through the wrong end of a scope, but they've replaced backpackers with purple guys in green overalls. This ticks me off because, as we've seen, they hire white people, purple mutants, and demon aliens, but no minorities. And the Contra guys are just two guys, they ain't hiring. Anyway, now you're running through the streets, shooting at everything, wondering when the bad guys will suddenly start turning into Guyver rejects. Fact is, the coolest thing I saw was a tank with three guys hanging out of it and part of an electric fence taped to the front.
The level progression in this game doesn't make a lot of sense, further emphasizing Contra is more fun if you don't apply real-world thought to it. Like how your little man can fire in a perfectly straight line while curled into a ball and somersaulting through the air, or why your guy always makes a little fart sound when he gets shot instead of grunting. When you shoot down the helicopter that dropped you off, you walk into a building. Inside, you'll be pleased to see it's big enough to support a series of tanks with gatling gun toting plastic army men for support. The green ones just kind of amble around, but the red ones will shoot at you. Then the thid level is a jungle. I can believe a tank expo is taking place in this building, but it's hard for me to buy that walking through the back door leads to an on-campus rain forest. And yes, more purple joggers and pink deer hunters await, in addition to a big mass of guns and used car parts that kind of looks like a robot spider but is probably Satan's hamster, given the last game.
Yeah, eventually the enemies get all twisted and demonic, but the joggers continue to happily bounce along in their purple jumpsuits no matter which intestine you're in. And I forget the last boss was, but it wasn't as cool a huge alien head puking cocktail shrimp at you.
-MANNA
It's funny to think these guys had no idea there would be a Super Nintendo.
Purple joggers to the left of me. Purple joggers to the left of me. Here I am. Stuck in the middle with you.